The Performance Jar

Hey Guys, 

So next week I will be in Hospital for about a week so I will do a special blog on Hospital life then but I thought I would take this opportunity to open the performance Jar. 

So would you believe me if I said I was a Drag Queen for a couple of years? Soooo many people double take when that part of my history is revealed to them. This was a paying job that I loved and I proved to people that a Woman can do anything a Man can do. But to get the whole picture of this story I think I have to start back at the very beginning. 

When I was 2 ¾ I had my first ballet lesson. I was beyond excited (from what I have been told). I was so enthusiastic but my ballet teacher would have to come and hold my hand throughout every single class because I would just get so caught up in the music and do my own thing instead of following the steps. 

My ballet teacher's name was Mrs Eva and I stayed training with her till was 13. She was a woman in her mid 70’s who was a Ballerina in Poland and escaped to Australia during WWII. This woman was tough as nails. The older I got the tougher she got on me and this woman taught me that absolutely nothing worth having comes easy in this life. I loved her like another grandmother but I also feared her, as she demanded perfection. From that time that I was 2 ¾ till I was 13 she groomed me to be a professional ballerina. She trained me to audition for the Australian Ballet but at 13 I made the fateful decision that I didn’t want to spend 30+ hours a week (+school) training. I wanted to hang out with my friends. I wanted to go to the dance school that my friends went to and do jazz and hip hop classes. I wanted to be a normal kid. 

So I left Mrs Eva and any hope of ever becoming a ballerina behind; I guess at 13 we aren’t really qualified to make lifelong decisions. I know it must have broken a small part of her heart and it broke mine too after years and years of literal sweat, blood and tears together but I knew that other students would come along and fill that space in her heart. To this day she is still one of the most influential people in my life. Although she was extremely tough and she demanded perfection she proved to me what a strong, independent, fearless woman looks like; and I miss her and think about her all the time. 

Flash forward a few years and I’m about 15 and being the creative person that I have always been, I’m starting to feel that creative expression itch. I wasn’t sure what I was supposed to do; my toned, athletic ballerina body had gone after a couple of years out of the game (plus puberty lol) so that was a no go. But something I have always had a huge passion for is film. As a little girl I would get my younger cousin and we would act out all the scenes to titanic (our favourite nighties Flic). We still know all the words to that film by heart. As a little girl I would watch films like 'The Wizard of OZ' and 'Funny Girl' and would just idolise Judy Garland and Barbra Streisand. They are still my idols. 

So I decided to join an acting class and I loved it! There is something really freeing in stepping into someone else’s shoes for a small while. I continued my classes and I moved up the ranks in difficulty until eventually I was given the opportunity to audition for ‘Queensland Actors Playhouse’. I was sure I was going to tank the audition but I managed to get in! I did this for about a year and then I started having some health problems (glandular fever) so I took a break. 

It was during this time while working for a Ten Pin Bowling Company that I met a really nice guy who I ended up becoming really good friends with. We would do a closing shift together at the bowl and the go to the valley and head out to the popular LGBTI bar and stay out all night having fun. And that was where I was introduced to my first Drag Queen show. I was just standing there all mesmerised by the glitter and the sequins and the fun. I loved it!

One day my friend came to work and told me that he was entering a Drag queen competition that the club was hosting. The winner got a spot as a regular on a particular night which was a pretty big deal so he went all out for it. He did the wigs and the sequin dress and the pumps and the big jewellery and a whole bunch of his friends and I went to support him in the audience and he was amazing. And he won!

After that night his Drag queen performing career took off at a huge speed and he was performing at all the LGBTI clubs in Brisbane. I used to go to his shows all the time and as a lovely surprising result, I made friends with a lot of the other Drag queens in Brisbane and the more I watched them perform, the more I wished I could do what they did. I loved the glamour; the big hair, the high heals, the big coats, the sequins and rhinestones and I loved how you could just take on a totally different persona up there on stage and be over the top. It was camp. I wished that I could do it but alas, I’m a woman and Drag just wasn't my game (or at least thats what I thought). 

I had this one friend that I had told (in confidence) about my little pipe dream (and he was so supportive) and he so happened to be a Drag Queen at LGBTI nightclub we had been going to for years. When we had had a few drinks after one of his shows I would bring it up but say how I was scared of what other people would think of me (could a woman truely do this? How would the other queens react? Would it upset some of my friendships?).  

Anyway one night after a couple of drinks this friend of mine had had enough of my doubting and just turned to me and yelled, “That’s it! I’m booking you in for a guest performance spot with me next Monday!”

And no matter how much I tried to back track (because I was terrified) it was already done. He had told the club owner and I was all booked in and advertised so I couldn’t back out. And I will forever thank him for doing that because he gave me the push I needed. 

So in a week’s time I got everything organised; the costumes, the wigs, the weaves, the makeup, the shoes, the performance, learning every word to each song to lip-sync perfectly. I had been teaching myself about makeup from Drag tutorials on YouTube for months so I tried my absolute hardest and it took me almost 3 hours. The moment before I stepped out on the stage I wanted to be sick but once I was out there I felt like I was home. The stage has always been my home.

The crowd reacted really well and slowly over the next year I went from being no one in the Drag community to being booked and paid at most of the major LGBTI clubs. I found out there was a term for what I was doing; it is called being a ‘Bio queen’. The term is ‘Bio” meaning biological woman. 

When I got sick this was another thing that slowly filtered out of my life but I am so glad that I got to experience it. It is something that not many women can say they have done and I was proud of every performance. I met some incredible people; people that I made lifelong memories with and people who taught me so much about life and if they are reading this they will know whom they are. 

So I guess the whole moral to this story is ‘don’t judge a book by its cover’. When people find out about this little bit of my history they are always shocked; they never think that I’m ‘the type’. They think that I’m not bold enough or brave enough or that I’m really just to boring. But when I was a little girl my ballet teacher Mrs Eva taught me that Women are strong as nails and can do anything they put their minds to. 

And that’s exactly what I did; I put my mind to it. 

Love and Light, 

Megan