The Nanny Jar

I was an ordinary person before I got sick. I had a lot of different jars that filled my life. Hopes and dreams, bills to pay, the mon-friday flow of things and family and friends outings, drinks and parties. Todays Jars that I’m going to open is my Job that I had before I got sick. A job that I loved, a job that I took pride in, a job that I was good at and a job that I miss very much. The Nanny Jar. 

Ever since I can remember I have loved children. Even when I was a child myself I loved children. When I was in Kindergarten I would refuse to take a nap so the teachers used to let me go around and pat the other little ones off to sleep with them. I was three years old. 

The reason I started Nanning was because I wanted to form closer, more impressionable relationships with the kids I was caring for, which is something that is much harder to obtain in a childcare or preschool setting. I wanted to make a difference in kid’s lives, even if it was a small difference, I would feel like my job was done. 

I still remember my first Nanny position. I was caring for a 4 year old and a 6 year old. I would care for the 4 year old while the 6 year old was at school and the 4 year old and I would go to swimming lessons, the art gallery and museum, the park, the library ect. For the first few weeks I felt like I was handling two newborns; suddenly entrusted with these two precious beings and I was starting from scratch. 

I got the hang of it quickly (even though you have those many 'what the hell am I doing, HELP ME GOOGLE moments)  and every 6-8 months I would generally move on (which would always break my heart) because either the child was starting school or a parent was no longer working and yes, once or twice, I did have a couple of ‘those’ type of mums that made working with them really, really, really hard (think ‘the Nanny Dairy’s’). 

I absolutely loved my job though and there was one particular family that I worked with for quite some time that I fell in love with. They were a family of 4 children, 2 pre teen boys and 3yr old twin girls. Their Mum and Dad owned a pretty large business so hours were quite unpredictable and they would often travel interstate for conferences and I would live in with the kids on these occasions. 

Those little 2 little girls stole my heart. I would wake them up in the morning and put them to sleep at night and do everything else for them in between. We would go on outings to Shorncliffe Jetty, play group, the museum, the park, the farm and everywhere else imaginable. We did every art and craft activity under the sun; painting and drawing was a daily occurrence. We played the frozen soundtrack on repeat all day, every day and they would sing their little lungs out. 

I knew their favourite colours, their favourite snacks, their favourite toys, their security blankets, their favourite movie, what makes them happy, what makes them sad, how to deescalate their meltdowns and what to do when they were having a bad day. 

If they hurt themselves they would put their little arms ups in the air and call my name and boy would I run for them and pick them up, to reassure them it is all going to be ok. I would hold them when they were sick and needed that comfort. Every single day they both would tell me at least once that they loved me and it would melt my heart.

And then I got sick and I had to say goodbye. And it broke my heart. That was one of the hardest bonds I had to say goodbye to but it's not fair to little ones to tell them you will back to visit sometimes but you can't be Nanny Megan anymore. They don't understand why you can't be there all the time like you used to be and its cruel to go back for little visits when they cry and cry when you have to leave. I had a couple of last visits with them when I got out of hospital and explained why I couldn't be Nanny Megan anymore. They cried, I cried. I gave them both Queen Elsa dresses because thats all they would talk about, day in, day out. Thats the funny thing about life; we never know which relationships are going to be our most important until we've lived them.

Being a Nanny is a different kind of job. You go to work every day in someone else’s home, build this incredibly loving and unique bond with a child (all the while knowing that one day you will have to leave this child) and from the beginning of your day till the time you get home your stress levels are at a 30 out of 10  because you are so hyperaware of every little thing that could go wrong or could bring harm to that child. You have been trusted with a person’s most precious little being and you want to make sure absolutely no harm comes their way. 

But it is a job that comes with some incredible rewards. When you witness a baby crawl for the first time, thats a wow moment! Or when they finally learn how to write down their name, you basically want to jump up and down squealing with excitement. Or when a little girl in your care tells the lady at the bank that ‘She’s smart too’ when the teller tells her she looks pretty (because you remind her each and every morning when you're getting her dressed that she’s not just pretty but she’s smart too). Those are the proud moments. They may seem small but they feel so huge when you are the one there to witness them.    

Hopefully when my health improves a bit more I can go back to a bit of part time Nanny work but as that certain little clock has been internally ticking (tick tock) as I get a little older I’m rather trying to get my health to a place where I can finally have my own little ones; something I’ve always wanted. 

But I am so grateful for all the experiences I have had with every child that I have worked with. Each of them is special and they all have taught me something. They have all left a special spot in my heart.

Well that’s the Nanny Jar. I’m not really sure what Jar I’m going to open up next week….I’m going to have to have a think. 

Until then love and light, 

Megan xo